Archive for the ‘Saturday Morning Ramblings’ Category.

HOUSTON… YOU’VE CURED MY PROBLEM

Dear Houston Texans players,

I’d like to publicly thank you for your part in helping me break my addiction to watching and caring about the NFL. I mean this sincerely. I have long wanted to step away from the 7 to 9 hours that I have continually wasted watching football on Sundays. I’ll now be able to invest that time in my family as opposed to locking up on the couch or dropping everything to throw away another $200 at the stadium.

Now that I think of it, breaking this addiction will be a huge financial bonus for us. No longer will we have to budget for an extra $360 for our DirecTV bill in the fall. We can invest that money in other things needed, or possibly even take a weekend trip somewhere.  You guys are the best!

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THE LINE FOR WINE DILEMMA

Discernment is a funny thing. We hear something and our brain pieces together the bits of audio, filling in the blanks by arranging the phonetic sound waves into a cipher that makes some sense of the accompanying surroundings. Unfortunately, my on-the-fly interpretation isn’t always an exercise free from flaws. Frequent are the times that I don’t hear and translate the audio with pinpoint precision.

Confession: This is why I gave up on British movies. I know what you’re thinking, “Did Mark just say he’s not a fan of Monty Python?” Yep… among others. My wife interpreted The Man From U.N.C.L.E. for me last year on the fly. I enjoyed the movie and walked away thinking that this was a much better role for Henry Cavill than that waste of 2½ hours he was a part of in 2013 (Man of Steel) or the flop of a follow up, Batman VS Superman in 2016, but I digress.

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CHECK, PLEASE!

Check Mark Guy

It’s ten-oh-three on a Saturday morning and I haven’t written a single word for this week’s Saturday Morning Ramble. Well technically, I have banged out nearly 30 at this point. Milestone! High fives all around.

Normally, by this time the page has been filled, edited, parts completely re-written, a few things added, posted on the blog page, a few pictures cropped and added, and then finally proof-read by my wife. At this point, at ten-oh-six on this Saturday, I’m not so much on schedule.

We’ll chock up this deviation form the normal Saturday morning routine to anticipation realization. That’s it. That’s a workable excuse. I’ve spent the last 3 days personalizing and packaging copies of PUSH for the US Postal Service. Finally, after a few design alterations and numerous edits of text, it’s in print and, more importantly, in bubble envelopes with addresses on them.

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BLOTTING OUT THE SUNS

Jax Jumbo Shrimp

“If at first the idea is not absurd,
then there is no hope for it.”

                      – Albert Einstein

From the days of my youth, the sun shone brightly in my hometown, especially in the first few days of spring. It appears, sadly, that those days have passed. This morning, as April 1st dawns, there’s a small part of me that genuinely grieves and an even larger part that wishes for all the world that I could close this post with the phrase, “April Fools!” The angst is real and the gotcha just isn’t coming, so don’t wait for it.

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DIVIDE AND CONQUER

Divide and Conquer - War RoomLast night the twelve of us held our annual ancient scholars meeting. If you’re keeping score, last night was Friday and the meeting of the minds was scheduled for primetime on the east coast. The timing of the meeting may lend credence to the accusation that the overall membership has indeed acquired that state of life-development where we might reasonably conclude that all wild seeds have long since been sown.

Although we do not maintain, nor publish, any specific demographic data, I’m fairly certain that everyone in the group is at least in their mid-40’s or beyond. Knowing the age of some of the members as a matter of conjecture tips the balance of the scale. It’s a good bet that, on the whole, the group skews somewhere near, or slightly past, the given parameter for mature (even though maturity on a member by member basis could certainly come into question at times).

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